Collision with Dr Who (6/7)
Hey Poo freaks, sharpen up your righteous indignation. Your
favourite radio character, Dr Poo, in his fabulous Turdis, has had an accident
with another time and space vehicle called, would you believe it - The TARDIS.
Driven by some fictional character calling himself, now get this - Dr Who! What
a rip off. I ask you, is nothing sacred? We've put it in the hands of our
lawyers. Need I say more?
The police have arrived.
Why did the tow trucks arrived first, Doctor?
Well they used to until the police took them over. Now they
Detective Sergeant Mad Mitts Tow Trucks Smash Repairs and
Intergalactic Police Force at your service. That'll be forty dollars thanks.
Opens cash register
Do you carry that cash register with you everywhere?
Only when I'm on duty, Miss. Forty dollars thanks. Well, what
happened to the other driver, son?
Well, constable, he said he had to rush off to do battle with
a rampaging giant pool table.
Ah then I'm afraid there could be problems.
He said he'd pay for everything. I'm to send him the bill
O no worries then. Look I'll take his forty dollars off you
now. No make it sixty dollars, I don't think I like the sound of this charge.
How much will it cost to get the Turdis repaired?
Well that all depends, let's see. Two hundred dollars with
the neg driving charge and ah, four hundred without.
Oh without the driving charge, I think.
And ah, I hate to ask but when will it be ready?
Ah well we're a bit snowed under at the moment, so we won't
be able to get it to you any sooner than um, last Thursday.
I suppose that will have to do.
Right now if you'd just like to step out of this time space
continuum, I'll tow your shit heap away.
The characters in this radio serial are real, and any resemblance to fictional BBC characters living or dead is totally intentional. Only the names have been changed to protect the next alias of Dr Poo-oo!
Transcribed by Phil from an off-air recording made by Warren.
Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.