The Great Universal Cuckoo Clock of Time (12/29)
The cosmic milkman's horse has produced almost magically,
little bit number two of the spare key of time. But the Dr is having trouble
persuading Dana to shovel it into her handbag and I'm not surprised.
This is no time to be squeamish, Dana. The universe is at
risk and we all have to do our bit.
Yeah, come on sister. I'm a horse and I've done my bit.
But I'm not putting your bit in my handbag.
Start shovelling that manure, Dana.
Get the lead out, toots. I've got deliveries to make.
I hope your milk's better than this.
Here mate. Why's that bird shovelling my horse's shit into
Your beast's manure is one of the seven little bits that make
up the spare key of time; with which I'll wind up the Great Cuckoo Clock of
Time and thereby foil the evil, Dr Wee.
Get away. And I thought you were just a pair of loonies.
Well done Dana. And tell me O noble milkman, by what name are
Fred's the name, Fred Nietzsche, glad to meet ya. And the 'orse's name is Zarathustra. I call him that, 'cause he speaks like, you know, thus spake Zarathustra.
2001: A Space Odyssey theme music played. It goes a bit wonky
That's it. The clue to the next bit. Thus spake Zarathustra.
Philosophy, manure, the horse, the cart.
What about d' cart?
D' cart, philosophy. Day cart? No but the manure. Night cart?
Of course, Rene Nightcartes. I stink, therefore I am. That philosophical
concept is in the third little bit of the key of time. And I'm sure I've got it
on that Wonder Crap record - A Hundred Pulverising Philosophy Hits for Your
Party. Come on Dana, back to the TURDIS.
Bye bye Fred.
I didn't know the Dr had such good taste. I've got that
record too. Mind you, the only trouble with philosophy records is that they
have to be played really loud and the neighbours complain about Bertrand
Russell at two hundred watts per channel at four o'clock in the morning. The
other thing the neighbours complain about is any episode of Poo-oo!
Transcribed by Phil from an off-air recording made by Warren.
Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.