The Great Universal Cuckoo Clock of Time (16/29)
As the myriad host of sweetly scented blossom stretched open
to embrace the randy little bee, I stub my toe on my mother's left leg...
All right, all right. The Dr only has to get the last two
diminutive constituents of the spare key of time and then he can wind up the
Great Universal Cuckoo Clock of Time and save the universe; thereby defeating
the inscrutable and untidy Dr Wee.
Sound of ship's foghorn
The ship lying alongside the TURDIS is the fifth diminutive
constituent of the key. The Captain is now going to throw us a line.
I say, I say, I say, did you hear the one about...
Kevin shoots Puke-Knightly
(Puke-Knightly falls down dead)
Thank you Kevin. As I was saying, the First Mate is going to
throw us a line which Dennis will catch. Ready Dennis?
(Dennis catches the line)
Right Dennis, now tie that line around the nearest bollard.
Oo arh, oo arh.
Bollard Dennis. I said bollard. Now this is a container ship,
so it must contain the clue to the whereabouts of the sixth diminutive
Dr, what's a dim native ah, constichuchent, you keep talking
Diminutive constituent. It means little bit; cretin. Really
Dana, sometimes you make me so mad I could hit you.
Oh poo! You wouldn't hit a fan would you?
What? Wait on, Poo hit a fan, near a ship. Ship in a fan. No,
ship hidden fan. Tell me Seaman Staines; are there any electric fans on board?
Arh yes. This ship be a bulk electric fan carrier. At our
last port of call we pumped five thousand tons of electric fans into her.
Come on, what are we waiting for?
In a few spilt seconds, they are up to their necks in a sea
of electric fans.
Sound of fans being tossed around
Tell me Staines, who owns these fans?
Well, since you shot the Captain, I suppose they're yours.
Oh, hello Poo fans.
I won't comment on that but if you like that sort of thing,
then I can highly recommend the next excruciating joke of Dr Poo-oo!
Transcribed by Phil from an off-air recording made by Warren.
Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.