Episode 160
The Great Universal Cuckoo Clock of Time (18/29)
January 1980

OPENING TITLES

KeviN

Using his typical pooey logic, the Dr has deduced that the seventh and final bit of the cutie of spam is some entertainer called Bob Dylan.

DR POO

Cutie of spam, Kevin?

KEVIN

Yes Dr, it's Tibetan for "the spare key of time".

DR POO

How strange. I thought "cutie of spam" was Albanian for "can I speak to the manager please?" You learn something every day.

DANA

Dr, what about the end of the universe?

DR POO

No Dana, that's Congolese for "my dance party's all booked up". But enough of this intellectual cross fertilization. To the job at hand. Where do we find this Matt Dylan person, Dennis?

DENNIS

Meow.

DR POO

Sorry, Bob Dylan.

DENNIS

Meow.

DR POO

No I am not climbing over a fence to get into any rock 'n roll display. That's dishonest. I'd rather steal some tickets.

DANA

Shouldn't we pay to get in?

DR POO

At fourteen dollars a head, you must be joking. I know what we'll do; we'll materialise the TURDIS backstage. Let's go.

Sound of footsteps

KEVIN

In the twinkling of an Ayatollah, our heroes have materialised backstage at a totally sold out Bob Dylan concert.

Sound of TURDIS landing

DR POO

Ah this looks like the place. I don't think anyone noticed the TURDIS materialising.

DANA

Ah Dr, remember that huge ship we had tied to the TURDIS?

DR POO

What about it Dana?

Sound of ship's foghorn

Concert music in the background

So much for the element of surprise. Oo; someone's coming.

Dylan

(Singing to the tune of Mr Tambourine Man)

Hey Mr Time Machine Man Have you materialised for me. I'm not sleepy and there is no place etc. Take me on a trip upon your magic swirling ship.

DR POO

Rack off fuzz face; we're looking for someone important.

KEVIN

Trust the Dr to insult a great rock singer like Dylan Thomas. Now he might cancel his guest appearance at the next episode of Dr Poo-oo!

End titles



Written by Lance Curtis, Geoff Kelso, Steve Johnston and Ken Matthews.
Transcribed by Phil from an off-air recording made by Warren.

Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.