Episode 175
Dr Poo in Ancient Egypt (ii)
February 1980

Opening titles

Kevin

Wow wee Poo people, have we got a surprise for you. Ah what? We haven't got a surprise for them? O well gang, it seems we haven't got a surprise for you so it's on with the episode.

Egyptian music

Dr Poo

When we meet the Pharaoh, Dana, I'm afraid you will have to cover your face with an ox.

Dana

Who says?

Dr Poo

It is written Dana.

Dana

Where's it written? I don't believe it.

Dr Poo

Hold on, here's my pad. O could I borrow your pen Dana?

(The Doctor writes on the paper)

Dana

And yea verily Dana shall cover her face with an ox. All right but what about you, Doctor?

Dr Poo

The Egyptians think that I am their great god TwoTonPooMan. When the Pharaoh is in my presence he has to cover his face with a caterpillar.

Official

All hail and a bit of sleet, a tall man with a funny hat enters.

Mexican music

Pharaoh

Thank you, thank you. And now for my next trick, I'm going to have an audience with great god TwoTonPooMan.

The crowd applauds

Dr Poo

It's him, Dana. This tall man with the funny hat is the Pharaoh.

Dana

O dear.

(Dana struggles to put on the ox)

Dr Poo

Shut up, Dana. Hail O Pharaoh.

Pharaoh

All hail O mighty god TwoTonPooMan.

Dr Poo

All right, where's the caterpillar?

Pharaoh

What caterpillar?

Dr Poo

It is written that in my presence, the Pharaoh shall cover his face with a caterpillar.

Pharaoh

Where's it written?

(The Doctor scribbles on some paper)

Dr Poo

There!

Pharaoh

Oh. Hey, any of you priests got a caterpillar on you?

Priest

Here, have one of mine.

Pharaoh

Oo tah. How's that your godliness?

Dr Poo

You're holding it the wrong way and your eyes are too close together and another thing...

Kevin

What a way to speak to a Pharaoh. Looks like Poo's new found deity has gone to his head. And it looks like his head has gone to the next caterpillar segment of Dr Poo-oo!



Written by Lance Curtis, Geoff Kelso, Steve Johnston and Ken Matthews.
Transcribed by Phil from an NAA recording.

Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.