Episode 228
Knee's Ahoy! (i)
May 1980

Opening titles

Kevin

When the Turdis landed in the ocean and filled with water, unfortunately no one drowned. The Doctor and Denis came too aboard a mysterious submarine. We now cross to said submarine where guess who is coming too to.

Dana

Who?

Kevin

You, dummy.

Dana

Oh, what happened? The last thing I remember is waking up in this strange room and trying to remember what happened. I know. I woke up in this room and remembered it. That's what happened. I wonder what will happen next.

Knock at the door and the door opens

And there was a knock at the door and the door opened and a strange man stepped into the room and said...

Nemoss

Hello mademoiselle, I trust you have made yourself a coffee table.

Dana

Where am I? Who are you?

Nemoss

You are on my submarine, the SS Nautilegs or for short the hardy ha ha to you Jacques Cousteau eat your heart out but everyone knows her as Nancy, mais oui.

Dana

I don't mind if I do.

(Dana and Nemoss waltz)

Nemoss

You dance bovinely.

Dana

Aw bull.

Nemoss

You fascinating creature. I have never wet anyone quite like you before. What is your name?

Dana

Dana. Dana Sock.

Nemoss

And I am Captain Nemoss but when we're alone you can call me Captain Nemoss.

Dana

When I'm alone you can call me whatever you like cause you won't be there.

Nemoss

Ho ho ho. You are so beautiful when you are stupid.

Dana

Thank you.

Nemoss

I'm suppose you are wondering about your companions.

Dana

No.

Nemoss

They are also safe aboard by submaroon along with your strange vesibulebule.

Dana

What.

Kevin

I can't underwear a shirt he sews. Why can't the purple spruik the prunes Danish proper like the renderer of us does on Trocadero doo-oo!

End titles



Written by Lance Curtis, Geoff Kelso, Steve Johnston and Ken Matthews.
Transcribed by Phil from an NAA recording.

Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.