Episode 386 Chinese Checkers (1/23) Mon 8 December 1980 Opening titles Kevin Hey kids, here's a great game that will keep you amused for hours on your end. At the sound of the buzzer, quickly glue these words - from, his, his, from, his, his, spittoon - into the following introduction. Dr Poo is speeding away Buzz - BUZZ home planet Galah Fee. Having made good Buzz escape Buzz - BUZZ most feared adversary BUZz wife Constance Buzz Sound of spitting into spittoon Dr Poo (Shouting) Now hear this. All hands on deck. No, cut the deck, make that bridge and clubs are trumps for a snap inspection. (Laughs) Snap! I win. Dana You're in a wistful mood, Doctor. Dr Poo O you're here. Good. I don't have to shout into this plastic cup anymore. Dana What's the beef, Chief? Dr Poo Roll call, Dana. Ham and custard? Dana Here. Dr Poo Piano tuna and salad? Kevin Here. Dr Poo Best actor in a supporting? Dana Ah, oh, um... Here. Dr Poo Don't try and cover for him Dana. All right Denis, where are you? Dana He's that little pile of ashes. Denis Meow. Dr Poo Denis! You're out of uniform Dana He got kind of, ah, cremated in your wifey pooh's microwave. Remember? Dr Poo That's no reason for him to turn up on parade in that slovenly attire. Denis, don't let it happen again. Dana Doctor, I'll cut up some of my old jeans and sew him back to his former self. Dr Poo Alright, but make it quack. Dana How? Dr Poo Put a beak on it. Now I have reason to believe that my Archduke Ferdinand enemy, Dr Wee, is plotting to gain complete dominion over the entire universe. Dana Oo, how do you know? Dr Poo O, I bumped into him the other day in the supermarket and he happened to mention it. Looks like it's going to be a jolly good bang up show. Telephone rings Dana Hello, yes. Kevin, it's for you. Kevin O thanks Dana. Ah, hello. Mmm. Hang on, I'll just write this down. Please announce the end of this episode of Dr... could you spell that last word please...P,O,O,O,O,O,O,O...! End titles Written by Lance Curtis, Geoff Kelso, Steve Johnston and Ken Matthews. Transcribed by Phil from his own off-air recording. Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.