Episode 408
Chinese Checkers (23/23)
Wed 7 January 1981

Opening titles

KEVIN

OK Poo fans, it's time we all had an exchange of views, so you all come over and look out my window and I'll go and look out all your windows or we could go and look out the Doctor's window because he's looking at things from Dana's point of view.

DANA

Doctor! Say something!

DR POO

O-er!

DR WEE

O boy, wait til I tell all the blokes at the Returned Villains Club about this, ho ho.

DANA

O Dr Wee, don't be so kind.

DR WEE

I'm not being kind, I'm being cruel.

DANA

I know, but you got to be cruel to be kind.

DR WEE

Well in that case I be super charitable, and kick you out of door of my mystical Time and Space potty.

DR POO

Oo-er Dana, what will happen to us?

DANA

Doctor, the Turdis is only on the other side of the door.

Door opens

DR WEE

Come on, shake a leg.

DR POO

Oh what fun.

DANA

What are you doing, Doctor?

DR POO

I'm shaking my leg.

DANA

Oh what fun. Come on, Denis.

DENIS

Meow.

DANA

(Singing)

You put your right foot in -

Dr Poo, Dana & Denis

(Singing)

You put your right foot out, you put your -

DR WEE

Bugger off!

He kicks them out. They fly through the air (oooh!) and land with a thud.

So long, suckers!

Gong

DR POO, DANA & DENIS

It takes one to know one!

DANA

We really got him that time, didn't we Doctor?

DR POO

I'll say, Dana.

DANA

OK, you can say it as often as you like.

DR POO

Dana, Dana, Dana, Dana, Dana. That was a stupid thing to say. Shut up, me.

(He slaps himself)

Oww! Thank you Poo, I needed that. Ah, it's good that I'm seeing things from my point of view again, because now I can set the controls for a new adventure.

DANA

Oh, goodie! Where to this time?

DR POO

Well, Dana, here are the Viva Cosmos travel brochures - take your pick.

DANA

How about this one?

DR POO

Earth during the Jurassic period? No, all the swamps would be booked out this time of year.

KEVIN

Well they needn't worry because no-one has any trouble sinking in the next swamp of Dr Poo-oo!

End titles



Written by Lance Curtis, Geoff Kelso, Steve Johnston and Ken Matthews.
Transcribed by Kevin from an off-air recording made by Warren.

Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.