Kak-Ronald's (x) August 1980 Opening titles Kevin In his bid to discover the secret motivations of the inner machinations of the Whopper Corporation's Kak-Ronald's Burger Planets, the Doctor is attending a conclave of clowns, who have been made rebumburnt by the afore by to mentioned Whopper Corporation. (CLOWNS - General murmur and horn blowing) Pinko Brother clowns. The Kak-Ronald's burger bosses are our class enemy. Clown Hear, hear. Pinko They've bought these automated robot Donald Kak-Ronald clowns into the workplace and forced the real working clown out onto the street. (Yells of agreement and horn blowing) Clowns of the universe unite. You have nothing to lose but the bearded lady's telephone number. Clowns (Yells of agreement) Boozo Brother Pinko. Pinko What is it brother Boozo. Boozo I've got this Doctor bloke here, who says he can help us. Dr Poo That's right. I believe I, Doctor Poo, can aid you in your struggle. Pinko Then you may take the chair, comrade. Dr Poo Thank you. (Dr Poo falls over) Ow, ooo ow. Clowns Ha ha ha ha. Dr Poo That's not funny. A person could hurt himself. Pinko It's a trick chair. What's the matter? Don't you know how to fall properly? Dr Poo No! (Sounds of disbelief) Pinko Can you make back flips? Dr Poo No. But I can make eggflips. Clown 1 What sort of clown are you? Dr Poo I'm not a clown. Clowns Oooo!! Clown 1 Bourgeois individualist. Pinko Capitalist ringmaster. Clown 2 Paper lion tamer. Clowns Yeah, yeah. Dr Poo Wait, wait. You've got me all wrong. Pinko He's a fifth columnist. Clowns Yeah, yeah. Pinko He's trying to us to infiltrate our movement. Dr Poo No I'm not. I'm one of you. I come from a real working clown background. I was cacked on by an elephant when I was only three. Pinko Lies! You're a spy. Dr Poo I a spy? Kevin That's right. I a spy with my little eye, something beginning the ending of the episode preceding the next elephant stool of Dr Poo-oo! END TITLES Written by Lance Curtis, Geoff Kelso, Steve Johnston and Ken Matthews. Transcribed by Phil from his own off-air recording. Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.