Kak-Ronald's (vi)
August 1980

Opening titles

Kevin

Haystacks and bales. If you remember, our scene is one of the myriad Kak-Ronald burger planets that are sprunging up all over the universe. If you don't remember, the scene is a yam patch, eight miles north east of Addis Ababa.

Dr Poo

What on earth are we doing in this yam patch?

Dana

Um, looking for yams?

Dr Poo

I remember! We're supposed to be on a Kak-Ronald's planet.

Exit sound effect

Ah, that's better Dana, back at the hamburger plot. Dana. DANA.

Exit sound effect

Dana

O Doctor, here you are. What a relief. If it hadn't been for that itinerant yam herder with his transistor radio, I never would have remembered where I was supposed to be. O, a dead clown.

Dr Poo

Dana, this is that Kak-Ronald's robot clown from the last episode.

Dana

I don't remember him.

Dr Poo

Don't say that. You'll have us back in that damn yam patch.

Dana

What yam patch?

Dr Poo

Carrot Dana and help me drag this robot into that alcove. There's a bunch of these Kak-Ronald's robot clowns coming this way. Well done Dana, and not a moment too soon.

Sound of marching and horns blowing

Dana

Wow! I haven't seen such precision clown marching since my brother's passing out ceremony at Duntroon.

Dr Poo

Your brother's in the army?

Dana

Well sort of. He's a tank. Well, he's only pretending really but they haven't found out yet.

Dr Poo

They haven't found out?

Dana

Well he can hit the target seven times out of ten. Which is more than real tanks can do.

Dr Poo

Horrifyingly fascinating Dana, but totally useless information. Now, put on this robot's clown suit. You're going undercover as a Kak-Ronald clown.

Dana

Ooah.

Kevin

Where are they? They should have been in this yam patch ages ago. O well. I expect we'll dig them up, in the next exciting yam patch of Dr Poo-oo!

END TITLES



Written by Lance Curtis, Geoff Kelso, Steve Johnston and Ken Matthews.
Transcribed by Phil from his own off-air recording.

Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.