Kak-Ronald's (viii)
August 1980

Opening titles

Kevin

Hi Poo gang. Kevin the announcer here with another introduction to another episode of Dr Poo. I'll just unwrap it.

Unwrapping noise

(Faster)

Hi Poo gang. Kevin the announcer here with another introduction to another episode of Dr Poo. I'll just unwrap it.

Unwrapping noise

(Even faster)

Hi Poo gang. Kevin the announcer here with another introduction to another episode of Dr Poo. I'll just unwrap it.

Unwrapping noise

(Faster again)

Hi Poo gang. Kevin the announcer here with another introduction to another episode of Dr Poo. I'll just unwrap it.

EXPLOSION

Ahhhhh!

Dr Poo

Par five.

(Boozo is heard sobbing in the background)

There, there. Be a good shear, you smelly old clown. I'm here now, so you have nothing to fear.

Dana

Except fear itself.

Dr Poo

Very true, Dana.

Dana

And terror and panic and dread, ooh yes dread can be pretty icky.

Dr Poo

Alright Dana.

Dana

And angst. O dear, there's nothing worse than angst. Except maybe cosmic angst.

(Boozo sobs in the background)

Dr Poo

Shut up Dana. You're frightening this poor decrepit fool. What's your name, O down and out baggy trousered one?

Boozo

Boozo the clown. I use to be the most popular clown in the entire galactic cluster.

(Boozo blows his nose)

Dana

So, what happened?

Boozo

These Kak-Ronald burger planets happened. That's what! And with all their Donald Kak-Ronald robot clowns, us real clowns just couldn't compete.

Dr Poo

Of course. These hideous automated clowns have made you redundant.

Boozo

That's right. First they treat us as carnival fodder and then they throw us on the scrap heap, replaced by bloody machines.

Dr Poo

I intend to find out who's at the bottom, behind and on top of this insidious multi- galactic Kak-Ronald's corporation.

Boozo

How?

Dana

Yes, how?

Kevin

Yes, how, why, where, what, when, which and who exploded my introduction to this episode of Dr Poo-oo!

END TITLES



Written by Lance Curtis, Geoff Kelso, Steve Johnston and Ken Matthews.
Transcribed by Phil from his own off-air recording.

Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.