- Interlude -
The Khan Ages - Episode 2
December 1979

Opening titles

ANNOUNCER

Having completely redecorated Rome, the Khans are now footloose and fancy-free. Ghengis calls the Mongrels together for a conflab.

(Everyone talking at once. Genghis calls the mongrels to order)

Genghis KHAN

Fellow mongrels! Does anyone know why I've called this meeting?

EVeryone

No!

Genghis KHAN

Shame. I was hoping somebody could have told me. Ah ha ha ha! What do you reckon, Bede?

BEDE

Well it's a lovely day, Dad.

Genghis KHAN

Right. As Bede has so rightly pointed out, it's a lovely day for a meeting.

Bede

Here, here.

Genghis Khan

Thank you Bede. So now you're all here we might as well talk about something.

NEVILLE

Point of order, Dad.

Genghis KHAN

Hold your head in, Neville, you're out of line. Take two steps backwards.

Brian

Ah get off me foot, Neville.

NEVILLE

Quit shoving!

Neville

Sorry Brian.

Genghis KHAN

Right-o you blokes, back to the task in hand. Which is...? Bede?

Bede

Well the question is, did the motion get through?

Genghis KHAN

Those in favour say 'I'?

EVERYONE

Oi!

Genghis KHAN

Right, that's settled then.

NEVILLE

What about the no's, Dad?

(Neville is hit)

(Muffled)

Ah - thanks, Dad.

Genghis KHAN

So much for the no's. OK, if there's no further business, it's off to Switzerland. Take your mounts.

(A woman starts screaming)

Put that woman down, Brian!

BRIAN

Aw geez Dad you said -

GENGHIS KHAN

Just get on your mastodon.

Mastodons growl

Mongrels, from the right, number, I!

NEVILLE

I!

Bede

I, I!

Brian

I, I, I!

Mongrel 2

I V!

NEVILLE

Hey! Look what's climbing out from under that pile of rubble!

Genghis KHAN

O, Caesar!

(A Woman screams)

Put that woman down, Brian!

Brian

Oh, but you said to seize -

Genghis KHAN

I meant Caesar the Roman Emperor.

Caesar

(With outrageous Italian accent)

Ah, you a-get out of here, you're all robbers.

Genghis KHAN

We're just comin'.

CAESAR

What-a we going to do, my city is in ruins!

Genghis KHAN

It'll bring the tourists in, you'll make a packet.

CAESAR

Great-a idea, we'll be rich!

Genghis KHAN

Mongrels - forward!

EVERYONE

(singing a football chant)

C'mon mongrels, c'mon, c'mon / C'mon mongrels, c'mon

Closing fanfare



Written by Lance Curtis, Geoff Kelso, Steve Johnston and Ken Matthews.
Transcribed by Kevin & Phil from an off-air recording made by Warren.

Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.