- Interlude - The Khan Ages - Episode 6 December 1979 Opening titles ANNOUNCER Owl slomicy heroes, the Khans, have pushed their way through Central Europe and are now barred from six different countries. Late one night they arrive at a two-bedroom, brick veneer house. Genghis KHAN Well, this must be Luxembourg. Doorbells and knocks at the door Open up, open up. NEVILLE Hey, Dad, it's three o'clock in the morning. BRIAN No wonder I'm hungry. Wouldn't mind a nice, juicy Luxemburger. Bede Do you ever think of anything else besides food, Brian? BRIAN Only at meal times. Genghis KHAN Hey Bede, what can you tell us about this place? Bede Luxembourg, with a population of forty-three and a half, is the second smallest country in the world if they all breathe in together. NEVILLE What happens when they breathe out? Bede Mass immigration. furious knocking at the door Genghis KHAN Come on, come on - haven't got all night. Creaky, rusty door opens Ah, here we go. OLD WOMAN (shrieking) Yes? Genghis KHAN Ah, evening madam. Old WOMAN Welcome to Luxembourg! Genghis KHAN Our mastodon appears to have broken down. I wonder could we use your carrier pigeon? Old WOMAN O sorry, our pigeon's been disconnected. Genghis KHAN Aaah. BRIAN I'll biff her one, Dad. Genghis KHAN Hang on, Brian. Old WOMAN But come in anyway, and sit by the fire. I'll fix you a nice supper. Genghis KHAN That's very kind, isn't it boys? Loud cheers Mongrels - ho! Crowd cheering continues Old WOMAN (Screaming) O dear! Mind the china cabinet! Greta, set another four thousand places for supper! I hope we've got enough cake forks! Genghis KHAN Right-o boys, make yourselves comfortable. But don't sit all down at once, we'll have to do it in shifts. Old WOMAN Tell me, young man - Genghis KHAN Genghis is the name, Genghis Khan, and these are my men, my boys. Old WOMAN Tell me, what do you think of our country? Genghis KHAN I'll just have a dicko. Boys, crouch down for a minute will you's? (There is sudden silence) Ah yeah, very nice. Old WOMAN Yeah we like it. It's comfortable. I'll show you round. Genghis KHAN Right-o. Old WOMAN Now this room here is our capital city. The hallway is the main road through to Central Luxembourg. We do have a most efficient transport system; just step onto this skateboard and we'll pop out into the suburbs, eh? Genghis KHAN And what's behind this door? A door is battered down Old WOMAN (Horrified) Don't go in there! O no, too late! Announcer Who or what is behind that door...? Closing fanfare Written by Lance Curtis, Geoff Kelso, Steve Johnston and Ken Matthews. Transcribed by Kevin from an off-air recording made by Warren. Copyright is retained by the ABC, Triple J and Curtis, Kelso, Johnston & Matthews and no breach of copyright is intended by this reproduction.